Hypothetically Speaking..16 Questions to Make you Think ‘Critically’

I’ll be the first, second and third person to admit it, critical thinking has never really been my “thing’, but I was recently challenged by a fellow blogger to answer a series of 100 questions designed to make any person dig deeper into their mind and soul. Now don’t worry my short attention span readers, I will only post 16 question and answers at a time, so breathe a sigh of relief!

1…2…3…GO!

What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?

Exact quote from a customer “for someone who doesn’t pluck their eyebrows…they are pretty even and natural..” Why thank you Ma’am, I quite enjoy your facial hair too! (Quite certain they worked for Hallmark.)

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ϟ What’s one thing you’re deeply proud of — but would never put on your résumé?

I can pick up pretty much anything from change to clothing items with my toes, and then I can toss it in the air and catch it with my hands! Pretty sure if this was an Olympic sport I could be a Gold Medal champion #prehensiletoes

ϟ What’s the most out-of-character choice you’ve ever made?

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My sophomore year of college I got my nose pierced, up left upper ear cartilage pierced and my right foot tattooed. The tattoo is the only thing that remains to this day.

ϟ If a mysterious benefactor wrote you a check for $5,000 and said, “Help me solve a problem — any problem!” … what would you do with him or her?

I would help them with the problem of my checking account not having an extra $5,000, then deposit said check, go buy some more cat food an extra gallon of milk write a quick Facebook status about it, and call it a day. Oh and World Peace.

ϟ What’s going to be carved on your (hypothetical) tombstone?tombstone

“Jennifer Lynne Shidler 11/05/1987-01/01/2079

Here lies Jennifer, daughter, sister, wife and terrible scpelller”

ϟ What are you FREAKISHLY good at?

This is a long but glorious list..1. As mentioned before, I can pick things up with my toes 2. Professional cat/bird wrangler (read my bird wrangler activities HERE) 3. Dressed and ready to go in 10 minutes if absolutely need be. 4. The ability to sleep in until noon and STILL feel like I barely got any sleep. 5. Best ‘singing in the shower’ Cher impression this side of the Mississippi

ϟ What’s one dream that you’ve tucked away, for the moment? How come?

Voice lessons..im pretty much tone deaf and would love to learn not to be…I have ‘tucked’ it away for now because I have yet to find the vocal coach who can endure all that I have to ‘offer’

ϟ What are you STARVING for?

I am starving for attention. Doesn’t this blog reek of that?! 😉 Other than that..I could realllly go for some TOKYO from Terre Haute Indiana!

ϟ If you could have tea with one fictional character, who would it be?

Harry-Potter-UK-Tea-Shops--2451After confirming fictional means fake or not real, I wouldn’t mind grabbing a spot of tea with one Mr. Harry Potter J

ϟ Do you have a morning ritual?

Hit alarm exactly 3 times, throw covers off of me wildly, bonus points if I launch my cat across the bed, scream..”I don’t want to go to work” get ready in 20 minutes and leave without grabbing my lunch

ϟ Do you believe in magic? When have you felt it?

carnival_magicIf by magic, you mean the Carnival Magic, a large cruise liner positively brimming with fun and magic..then yes..I believe in magic!

ϟ What’s your personal anthem or theme song?

I really like Beautiful by the great Carole King. Listen to the song HERE. You will not be disappointed!

“You’ve got to get up every morning
With a smile on your face
And show the world
All the love in your heart

Then people gonna treat you better
You’re gonna find, yes you will
That you’re beautiful as you feel”

ϟ Do you ever think you could live a life without Facebook?

People have lived in a world without electricity, cars and toilet paper…but now that we have seen the error of our ways…would you go back to a pre-toliet paper world?! Didn’t think soo…but in all seriousness..no, no I couldn’t. seriously. :/

ϟ What’s your definition of an ideal houseguest?

One that doesn’t mind that I cannot cook, I work weird hours, and that my cats will do everything in their power to get into whatever room you are in that has the door closed, just to watch you sleep and or shower. My cats do not know how to love you from afar…

ϟ If you had an extra $100 to spend on yourself every week, what would you do?

As lazy and terrible as it sounds I would totally hire a cleaning company to come in once a week to freshen up my house. Anything to keep up with my two fur ball cats that produce more cat hair per capita than apple produces iPhone’s in a year.

ϟ If you could sit down with your 15-year old self, what would you tell him or her? Me at 15 years old! PUT THE BURGER AND POP DOWN AND GO OUTSIDE AND PLAY…oh and there is this guy named Matthew Shidler…he lives just south of Terre Haute..you are going to meet him your freshman year of college (that’s right..your going to college)..pay more attention to him because when you meet him again your junior year of college, he is going to change your life! 🙂

Someone challenged me, now I am challenging you! How would you answer some of the worlds toughest questions?! If you write a blog, link back to me if you post this..or answer some of your favorite questions in the comment section below!

A Bird In The Hand Is Worth Two…In The Dryer….

What better way to return from a blogging hiatus (sorry guys)  than with a touching tale of a woman, her two cats, and un-wanted house guest residing in her dryer. Let me start from the beginning

I was told when we first bought our home, that part of the ‘fun’ of owning your own place was being King Queen of the castle and getting to make your own decisions. For instance, If I want a hot pink wall in the laundry room, than hot pink it shall be. (I promise I do not really have a hot pink wall)

What they did not tell me was that with a new house, comes the opportunity to explore different career paths. For instance..

General Contractor/Repair Man.  Lets say you make your husband move the furniture around just one last time because you are just positive that table will look better just a smidge to the left, and he ‘accidently’ knocks a hole in the wall, you get to repair it..not a landlord. 

Plumber: in this instance, you find yourself in an unseasonably cold Texas winter, and while you are used to cold winters and pipes freezing in Indiana, your Texas house…and its brand new sprinkler system is not, and you find yourself outside at 10pm with a hair dryer, old new towels and duct tape hoping to thaw them before they explode.

Lastly….

 Animal control: This time, your comfortably asleep in your bed, its your day off and you have no plans other than to be lazy. Suddenly, as if you are a character in the children’s book “The Night Before Christmas” a loud noise comes from the other end of the house. Thinking its the cats fighting, you threaten them with the water bottle, again, and go back to sleep. Order seems restored, until it happens again. This time, you get a little more aggressive with the yelling and fire a warning water shot in the general direction of the noise and again, go back to sleep. It is then you realize that one of the cats has burrowed himself into the blankets, presumably out of fear. Now, slightly freaked out because you know the cats cant be the source of the noise, you get out of bed, change your clothes (because your high school gym shorts and spaghetti strap shirt are not proper attire when you have an un-wanted house guest..) grab your phone and head to the origination of the noise.

A Strange Sound Comes From The Dryer

 

Nothing, and I mean nothing, makes a 26 year old woman feel like a 5 year old girl faster than a weird noise coming from a what should be silent dryer. You better believe I was hysterically calling/begging/demanding my husband to come home from work and rescue me from certain death.

To kill time and to make sure there was a witness to my death just in case Matthew did not make it home in time, I face timed my mom.

A single mother with two strong willed kids, my mom is, of course, trained and experienced in hostage situations, and was able to comfort scare me, until my animal control specialist arrived home.

30 minutes, a pile of clean/dry socks and an extended grabber later, Matthew and I were now the proud owners of a tiny brown sparrow who thought it would be cute to slide down our dryer vent. She, however, did not stay long. Like a white dove being released at a wedding..this sparrow had better plans that did not involve being fluffed and folded.

 

 

 

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Blair witch All gone

 

 

How Not To Fly A Plane

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Most of you probably already know that my husband is a flight instructor. He is paid to hop in a plane everyday with people he barely knows and teaches them how to fly gracefully above the beautiful Texas land. As you can imagine, a job like this would require a fair amount of trust and patience (neither quality I strongly posses’). While I have been given the chance to fly quite regularly with Matthew over the last 5 years, I have never really taken the initiative to ‘learn’ the ropes of the plane if for any reason to share in his hobby that he is so passionate about (and of course to be able to personally answer yes if a flight attendant yells “oh my gosh, is there a pilot on board” on a crowded plane). Well that all changed today when I asked my brave, oh so brave, husband to treat me like a first time student and not his wife of three years. I could see this ending in one of two ways; 1. I am a natural Amelia Earhart, a maverick in the sky, pushing all the right buttons and making all the radio calls. or 2. I am a natural yet elusive Turkey, surprising agile, but limited in airtime as we like to stay closer to the ground because that is where the food is at. I’ll let you all be the judge of that. The following are just a few key items to remember when wanting to learn how to fly:

  • Evaluate relationship with flight instructor

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  • Whether your married to your instructor or not, it is probably a wise idea to make sure that the personalities line up enough to where you feel comfortable to learn and to be taught. If it is someone who makes you nervous or annoys you, the motivation and drive to really learn may not be there. In my case, I needed to look at several different things. Were our wills in place just in case I manage to kill one or both of us (ie. who will get the cats..liz lemon?)? Are the spare blankets clean in the event of a major fight that will result in my husband sleeping on the couch for a night or two? Have I done anything to make him angry in the last month that would tempt him to push me out of a plane at 3,000 ft. Who has the better divorce lawyer? These are all very important situations to consider!
  • Pre-flight Check List

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  • I am a list girl, so when Matthew whipped out this little book of items to check before taking of, I was in OCD heaven. Of the 100 or so preflight tasks to complete, I shall focus on an important one.  Apparently it is quite crucial to UNTIE said plane for the earth to which it is bound to. Who knew that three tethered ropes make the difference between going….and not going. My flight instructor knew this the whole time, and was testing me. I, failed miserably..Plane 1 Jennifer 0
  • Get familiar with dials on panel

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    • We were flying a 2001 Cessna 172 which contains about 15 circular dials and one updated flux capacitor. Matthew did a quick rundown of a few of the dials, and I will short hand for you what I learned.
      • 1: Air speed indicator, tells you how fast you are going Smile duh..even a flightless bird such as the Ostrich could tell you that!
      • 2: Attitude indicator, reminds you ‘loose the tude’ and to check yourself before you wreck yourself, literally
      • 3: “Imitator” lets you know on a scale of 0-9 how close your imitation of being a pilot is. 0-2 you look like an ostrich,3-5  you’re a turkey 6-9 Amelia Earhart
      • 4:  Turn Coordinator with Gyroscope tells pilot how sharply they are going to need to tilt plane. if done correctly a fresh Gyro will be waiting for them upon landing.
      • 5: Plane indicator, is there solely to remind pilot that they are in fact flying a plane and not a train or a car.
      • 6: Vertical speed indicator..which is code for..your falling to the ground..and this is how fast your going to get there
      • 7: Candy cane indicator, lets pilot know exactly how long and how far they have to fly to get to the North Pole
  • Be clear with radio
    • For almost your whole flight you are connected with the flight instructor and tower by way of radio. This is so your position and your intentions are clear to all around you. For me..a person who clearly loves the sound of their own voice, it became a new venue to sing todays greatest hits. Fun fact: Did you know singing Miley Cyrus’ “We Cant Stop” is sudden and instant grounds to be dismissed from the plane by the flight instructor, even at 3000 feet? Furthermore, At one point I asked Matthew to stall and kill time as I was texting a friend that we were currently above them so they could come out and waive…he took this statement quite literal and “stalled” the plane..I stopped singing Miley after that.

We were in the air for a whopping total of 18 minutes before we, in an attempt to save the plane the citizens of bell county and our marriage, decided to land gracefully. I am proud to announce that no one died, no one is getting divorced and no one is sleeping on the couch. I will, however, be finding another hobby though Smile

I’m Back!

Summer break is over, and my writing hiatus has ended! A lot has happened since my last post (hence the writing break) So I will need to catch you up in a pinch. What better way to do this than with an epic “list” post covering everything some stuff I’ve learned or experienced in the last few months.

  1. My instructions I left you in my last post about how to pick a winning NCAA bracket (read it HERE) are apparently not accurate. If anyone lost any money on using my “sure fire” method…sorry everyone!
  2. Buying a house is a stressful situation but in the end is totally worth it! Love having a HOME to come to after a hard day of work versus an apartment that has the haunting stench of the former renter’s pets.Home Sweet Home!
  3. Pets, even the ones you love dearly, become slightly less loveable when they all the sudden rack up a 500 vet bills and permanently require cat food that costs 50$ for 20lbs. But then they look at you like this…and it’s all better! 
  4. Cannon ball jumping into a 4ft pool when you are 26, slightly fluffy and on a vacation that requires a lot of walking is a bad idea…unless you want to spend the rest of your vacation with elevated feet in a hotel room with nothing but TELEMUNDO! Just ask my husband 😉
  5. I have beaten my record of consecutive number of days without chewing on my finger nails from 1 day to 2 weeks. Watch out world!
  6. Did you know that if you spray furniture polish on stained concrete floors you can instantly create an Ice rink fun for any man woman or four legged creature already struggling with friction problems.grave mix up in the kitchen...
  7. I have recently come to grips with the fact that I may never be able to “twerk” and am completely ok with that revelation. (so is half of America that is gifted with the sense of sight).
  8. Twinkies are back in stock, therefore I am stereotypically complete again!130712113828-walmart-twinkies-620xa
  9. My brave husband is teaching me how to shoot gun, believe it or not, I managed to hit the target, just above the right shoulder (not a kill shot). He is convinced I will get better with time and practice. I am convinced I will get better with time, practice and a pretty pink gun with an engraved rose or maybe a cat on the grip.17746_10100419870513244_1077010215_n
  10. Upon my request, my husband recently paid a mariachi band 10$ to serenade me at a river walk restaurant in down town San Antonio, furthermore, this was the best 10$ I have EVER spent! (Please excuse the fat arm, I was trying to discretely record this epic experience.)  

..::How NOT To Build A NCAA Bracket::..

Its March. The sun is proving to be a bit warmer and the post super bowl winter induced comas are lifting as we quickly shuffle into the next time consuming sports tournament, the NCAA college basketball tourney…AKA MARCH MADNESS!! Now, what kind of Hoosier would I be if I didn’t have at least have one post about this basket ball event? From what I’ve been told and observed the last 25 years, is that basketball is a pretty big deal in Indiana. For my Texas readers, you know how football is a big deal here? Yep, that’s what basketball is in Indiana. Still not convinced, then either Google the term ‘Hoosier Hysteria’ or rent the movie “Hoosiers” and learn.

   With all that being said, the tournament is only a few days away so to the brackets we must go! I have created my own bracket every year since Mr. Millikan’s 5th grade class(eek that’s been like 15 years) and I have successfully made thse predictions on my own. Let me clarify: By ‘successfully’ I in no way mean that I won ANY of these predictions, I simply mean that I didn’t leave any blank spots (go me!) I didn’t pick teams that were not included in the tournament and I, or someone else, kept track of the progress. I stand by my belief that my reason for not winning the last 15 years, was not because I didn’t possess the knowledge to correctly pick the team, but it was because I was going about it all the wrong way. So I am here to say that 2013 IS MY YEAR!!! I’m all in it to win it! What’s on the line, you ask? My reputation as the worst basketball manager that the Turkey Run Jr.Sr. Girls varsity basketball team has ever had. (no seriously..I was terrible…..).

I used ESPN to create my bracket. When you log in they give you the opportunity to educate yourself with 68 facts ‘before’ you  start picking your teams. These facts went something like this “ number 2 teams only have reached the big game 1 out of 10 times’…something like that. 68 of them!! Who has time for that? Not me. So I came up with a more manageable list that is sure take me and my bracket all the way to the end!

To start you need to pull up the full bracket with the first parings and use the next few tips to weed out the schools to you are down to the ultimate winner (Should look something like this at the beginning):

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1.) Whenever you come across a pairing that has a sate that you either lived in or a state that you have close ties with, they automatically advance.

** If two teams fit this qualification, pick the one that you may already be paying student loans . If this is not applicable (lucky) then you need to select the team that has the more flatting uniform color choice or has the best mascot. (you can choose which of those two)

2.) Eliminate any schools that hold bad memories that may one day cause therapy. For example: “My 8th grade boyfriend had a cousin who once stole my SpongeBob towel at the 9th grade summer pool party and never gave it back. I hear that she is studying physics at Michigan State University now…” using this equation…Michigan State University would be OUT!

3.) If you have NEVER in your life heard of a school in the pairing **cough cough IONA University cough cough** (2 points for a reader if they can explain to me where the heck this college is and why in 25 years I have never heard of it…) ..then its bye bye bracket.

**Unless the school has a fun name to say. For example..”Gonzaga..Gonzaga..Gonzaga” no idea where this school is located but oh how cool would it be to have a diploma that said BS of Gonzaga.

**Word associations always work too. Never heard of Belmont university but it makes me think of the EL train in Chicago, or Davidson university, which is obviously where all Harleys go to get an education.

4. Schools that are usually well known for other things other than sports should get at least one advancement in the bracket rounds. For example, I noticed Harvard was listed. Can’t say I’ve heard of anyone getting a four year scholarship to Harvard to play ball, but hey,  what do I know. 2 points and a bracket advance for being well rounded!  no pun intended.

As we start getting down to the nitty gritty, we need to start focusing on more important matters and facts to make sure our bracket is clear and thought out. Which why number 5 is important. This is where it gets real folks. 

5.) Which teams have the better mascot? If the school does not have have a mascot (which really should be an automatic loss in my opinion) look at the school spirit section. Are they well coordinated, do they have at least one student (or more) covered from head to toe in war paint? Is the pep band playing the Harlem shake, or a medley of who let the dogs out and the thong song (yikes)?

6.) Color coordination. In an ideal world where time is not an issue, I would look at the starters of each of the remaining teams in my bracket and cross reference their eye and hair color with that of their uniforms and enter them into an excel database that will then graph the statistical probability of being the most eye pleasing on a championship poster. Basically what we are looking for here people, is the team who “pops” the most.

7.)When you get down to the last few teams you need to think proximity. Which team are you most likely be able to visit in the even of a totally awesome championship parade? For example, you live in Texas (YEEEHAWW) and the schools in the final four are in California, Florida, Arkansas and Michigan. If the team from Arkansas were to win, you would have a better shot to reap the benefits from their win then you would from a team in Michigan.

8.) You’ve made it to the end, and now there are two teams left. Who do you pick? Up until this point, I have asked you to call upon the cold hard facts and scientific calculations to make all of your decisions (this gibberish is scientific..I swear). It is at this point that these equations wont help you. This last pick between the final two needs to come from your gut. Good luck..you got this!

 

Bam! I just did in 8 steps what ESPN felt needed 62. Who did you put at the top of your bracket?! Comment back and let me know 🙂 I am so excited to see how these predictions I made pan out. Here is how I see this years tournament based on my equations above. Enjoy!! 🙂 GO HOOSIERS!

 

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**Disclaimer: I, Jennifer Shidler, am in no way responsible for any money you the reader may loose by using my bracket selection method. I know absolutely nothing about basketball and am quite certain that if you listen to my advice you deserved to loose…that is all..Good Luck 🙂 lol

Putting the Puzzle Together

The following is something I wrote the summer of 2009 as I worked a 12am – 7 am shift in the computer lab at Indiana State University. Matthew and I would have been dating for about 10 months and this note is looking at the years 2006-2009. I found this today as I was cleaning and packing our office. And while I vaguely remember writing this, It is a great reminder of how AWESOME our God is!

“He came through for me just as I was about to doubt him, God that is. It’s funny you know, there Our first picture everhave been so many reasons for me to angry, irritated, doubtful, mad, and confused in the last 5 years, and believe me, I have had my share of these emotions at times, but in the end, I have tried to remain faithful that, God’s plan, whatever it may be, would prevail and that I would someday understand the doubts, the irritations, and the worries. I am sitting at work tonight, trying to place myself in my shoes a year ago (July 2008). Who was I? Where was I at in my life, what were my goals, what were my worries, who did I even hang out with? As I sat here replaying the last summers events through my mind like a 1970’s video reel, I became rather tearful, which I guess is ok because, let’s face it, there is no one in the lab right now, its 4 am.

10624_589334347404_32311634_34196013_1531951_n Where was I last year (July 2008)? Scared. Scared of having to pay rent for the first time in my life, scared that I was going to be a junior in college and afraid that I would lose the good grades I have just started to earn a few semesters before. Worried that I would be to afraid to venture out of central Indiana to pursue a job that I would love, and worried that I would be alone forever. That’s a scary feeling you know.  It was a terrible feeling to see that all of my friends were getting married, and here I was, “alone”; while as embarrassing as it is to admit, it just proves God’s amazingness even more. I can still remember those first few nights/weeks in the new house. I was so scared, all alone, in the “city”. I put my trunk and chair in front of my door and slept with the lights on. Yes, lights on. I also remember fighting back and forth with myself and with God. I wanted to believe the words I was telling myself every time I began to feel this way, that God had this amazing person out there for me,in your arms that he wouldn’t leave me hanging, and I just needed to work through things, but as soon as I would tell myself that he had a plan and that it would be ok, I would immediately find myself screaming quietly “WHERE IS HE? WHY IS THIS SO HARD? WHY AM I STILL ALONE?” This inner tormenting had been happening for years, and at the time, I never thought it was going to end.

Then, as if it part of His plan all along, I remember lying in bed one night, it was just a few short  weeks after my junior year of college started, and I found myself again crying and praying. Like usual when I was alone at night, I just accepted the reality that maybe God had something different for me, maybe there was some greater plan that didn’t necessarily involve a knight in shining armor. It was then that I decided that no matter his plan I would embrace it and remember that HIS will and HIS way is better than any road journey I could ever come up with.

Now with that said, I want to reveal the true amazingness that HE is. While I had decided then to no longer doubt and argue in my prayers, I really did not think that God would show up and reveal part of his plan to me so soon. I thought somewhere down the Matthew Graduationroad, maybe after college the pieces of the puzzle would come together and I would have this grand “a-ha” moment. If you are reading this now, I imagine you know exactly what happened; I met the man that I KNOW God has planned for me to be with. The feeling of knowing you are a part of something that God has brought together and blessed is a feeling that cannot be put in to words. In fact, when I ever I try to explore,  to break down or n32311634_33356441_7084375 analyze the way that Matt and I came to be, tears are what come out instead.

I feel that one of the greatest aspects of this particular plan is that the same way God prepared me and my heart, God prepared Matthew’s. A few weeks after being with Matthew we began to talk about our relationship with God, where he has lead us individually and where we hoped to be led in the future, things like that. The topic of our biggest struggles 3came up. And we quickly realized that our  stories were not that different from each others. Matthew prayed the same prayer and had the same conversation with God that I had just weeks before I did. For once, neither one of us asked that God stop the lollygagging and send the one we were  supposed to be with, but rather we asked for peace, patience and understanding with whatever plan and path HE had choose for us.

And here we are almost 11 months later, and I find myself tearing up every day thinking about how much I doubted God and his plan for me. Yes, I know it’s going to be hard, and yes, there are times where I’m going to want to doubt situations in my life. It is my continual trust and faith in God that keeps me going from day to day, even when sometimes I just feel like giving up”Thanksgiving

Written July 29, 2009

La La La La La..Living the Apartment Life

I swore up and down after my college years I would never again dwell in a house that shared walls, floors and ceilings with other people and after a wonderful year and a half living in a house we had fallen in love with, we are right back to square one. An apartment. Sigh.  The next is a list of items that remind me daily of how much I miss having a house..enjoy.

As I recall it Snow White was awoken to the beautiful animals of the Forrest singing in a heavenly tune. Similarly, I have often awoken to the sounds of saw blades as the construction crew works on the apartments outside. Many A time I’ve been greeted with the sweet sound vocals of Amedeo estevan (one of the workers who introduced himself to me last week) singing loudly outside my door. Amedeo, if I do say so myself, has a lovely voice!

Living on the second floor apartment is like having box seats at the opera. If you pick you location just right, your new home could be center stage of a real life soap opera. For instance, our neighbors across the way have been fighting this past week (we are talking clothes flying, doors slamming, dogs barking)..this is where the Adirondack chairs on the balcony come in to play. They sit low enough where the people fighting can’t see me, but I can clearly see them. Apartment Dweller Tip: Warning, while your may be hidden by railing of the porch, they WILL able to smell the popcorn you just popped just for this event. Next thing you know you’ve been court ordered to appear before a jury on your neighbors behalf.  and lets face it..‘ain’t nobody got time for that’

In conjunction with the last point, it is a given that the chances increase of your statistical probability of being on or seeing an episodes of cops filmed live in front of you..Apartment dweller tip:always look ur best! Never know when the cameras will be rolling! 🙂

Having no bike racks and living on the second floor means Athletically challenged people with 2 bikes..don’t ever ride bikes..true story.

Apartment dweller tip: Potted flowers are an essential piece to separating your stylish balcony from another’s ..that is unless you are me and living “non human” objects require far more of a commitment than you are able to commit to right now, in which case those are an eye sore…and you will fit right in Winking smile 

Evolution of Jennifers Laundry….The largest item on my list that reminds me of how much I miss living in a house is the process of doing laundry. I hate laundry..I miss being little..all I had to do was put the dirty laundry in the hamper and just like dry cleaning pick them up when done..fluffed and folded! I had a sweet ride on the laundry train for close to 17 years until college, college was the end of the end. I now present to you the evolution of Jennifer’s laundry.

It was my senior year of college and it was also my first Year of Marriage (we got married two weeks after graduation) All four years of college were nothing more that thwarted attempts of dragging a weeks worth of laundry to my moms house. It wasn’t until my last roommate before my husband did we have the chance of doing laundry in the same building and floor that we lived on. This lasted for 2 glorious semesters and then it was over just like that. Once I got married, I inherited twice the loads of laundry and to top it all off, our first apartment had no washer and dryer. 2 wedding rings and and an I do later and BAM we became a happily married nomadic laundry tribe. Wondering to and fro, doing our laundry where ever we could. “Of course we would love to come over and have dinner with you guys..should I bring a desert, also..do you mind if we borrow your washer and dryer?”

Luckily for us 3 months in to wedded bliss our lease was up in our ‘laundryless’ apartment and we were moving up in the world..for the first time ever as a married couple we had a washer a dryer in the same house and on the same level!!!!! It was the laundry honeymoon I have always wanted! No more hauling baskets and detergent to other houses and alienating our family friends! It was just us and our laundry!!

But the laundry honeymoon didn’t last forever..a new job opportunity meant a new house..and a new house means another round of laundry roulette "step right  up folks. Place your bets and take your chances in whirlpool wheel of death!" granted at this point in the game I was genuinely happy to have a nice house in a safe neighbor hood..pet friendly and as long as the washer and dryer wasn’t adjacent to the outhouse in the back yard..we were good! This time around the washer and dryer were in the basement..and while that is was a step back from the "honeymoon days" this round had a delightful And rather intriguing surprise; a laundry chute!

The Chute: Now any kid product of the late 80s should always associate a laundry chute with one memory and that is Kevin from Home Alone shooting toy soldiers with his brothers bb gun..it was cool then, and yes my friends it’s cool now! Not only was is the chute a magical portal of commutation to nag at my husband or meow at my cat from another floor..but it also served as the epic of all epic hiding places. You know, that one hiding place that you have planned out ahead in your mind for any environment you frequent..work,home,the gym (well,maybe not the gym for me) but those places you spend the most time. it is in these places that I have a hiding place planned out if anyone ever tried to break in/rob or if an impromptu hide and seek match erupted, I would be safe and golden! In my new house..the laundry chute was that place! I had already decided based on estimated measurements and actual attempts (I was bored) that I could fit myself and one cat (the quietest cat preferably) successfully in the laundry chute without being detected..the other cat would need to fend for himself..life’s rough..

Present Day….let me catch you up. Matthew and I have been in the great state of Texas going on 10 months..and this nomadic laundry tribe is still alive and kicking with possibly the worst of all laundry experiences…we are back to apartment life and this time while the apartment itself is nicer, the second story trek that involves me leaving the building, going down 2 flights of stairs (then back up them later) walking around the back to the next building and doing laundry in a room that equals that of a low level frat house..is less than ideal. If you’ve read this far you are probably thinking 1 of 2 things..either "grow up..it’s laundry..your an adult..stop complaining" or your asking yourself "Oh goodness Jennifer, how have you lasted this long you" well those of you asking the first question..I agree and the first step is admitting you have a problem and this post serves as your official notice! For those who are asking the second..I would say to you..”I KNOW RIGHT!” Thanks for the back up 🙂

So what’s it all about?! This post serves as another notice..a notice of gratitude and thanks to my husband..for the last 4 years the man has heard me whine and complain and has seen me wear and re-wear clothes until the point of no return and what has he done? EVERYTHING! 🙂 I often hear other girls talk about their husbands and how they never pick up, never do dishes and don’t even know how to do laundry..that is not the case in this house hold..my husband does laundry every Sunday while I’m at work..measuring just the right amount of softener..detergent..separating colors..drying the items that need dried and hanging up the items that can’t go in the dryer..that’s right ladies..he hangs up my bras!! ( my " I trained my husband the hang up bras..and you can too!" book is due out next fall) he does not complain..he does not try to get out of it..he does this because he loves me (and values my sanity Smile)..and does not see the benefit of turning underwear inside out for a day two reprise Smile I love my husband..I love that helps with everything..and I love most of all that he puts up with me and my ‘not soo June cleaver ways!